Nic (Chapter 1) part 1

    The only feeling that was worth noticing in this bright, loud room. Everyone pleased with themselves. Everyone simply taken alight with their fantasies, that may or may not ever come true. Who am I? I am Nic. Sometimes I think I was cursed to be this way. Even my parent's named me "nothing". Just so that when I introduce my self I can say "Hello, I am Nic. I am Nothing."

    This classroom is the vain of my existence. Full of unworthy souls stealing precious air that I once thought was sacred. How could they be so selfish? They steal our air, our thoughts, our minds. 

    Our souls.

    To think that once, not to long ago, I was a part of this never ending cycle. The cycle of hate, lies, greed and misery. Why was I so foolish? I should've known better. But I didn't. I followed them around aimlessly, like a dog, hoping that they would give me the time of day, that they would somehow understand me. But that was a big mistake. I got into their system. I became one of them. But in doing so, I lost who I was. I lost, who I am.

    "Nic! Wake up!"

    "What, What! I'm up", I said without giving it a second thought.

    "Hey Nic, it's time to leave, school's over."

    "Really?" I answered, half awake. My vision still too blurry to see who was attempting to get my attention.

    "I thought that you were sick or something. School ended 3 hours ago."

    "What! Why didn't you wake me up sooner? I need to get home!"

    I'm not sure why someone would stay so late to watch me sleep, but I don't have time for this, I have to go. I must get home before my parents start to worry.

    "Can you walk me home? I live in the same direction as you and it's really late. The streets get really dangerous at night.", she said. As if she had planned this out from the start.

    Then suddenly, I knew who I was talking to. Confused, sleepy and still a little out of it, I simple said what anyone would say.

    "Sure Vira, I'll walk you home."

    "I'm glad. I have to talk to you about something. And i didn't know when else to tell you, so sorry for not waking you up."

    Talk to me? About what? Have I offended her? Is she going to yell at me for not going to her piano recital last Thursday? Did she notice that I have been trying to keep a little distance between us? No matter what, can I be honest with her and truthfully answer her questions? I don't know how to say this, but I've never had any luck talking to girls, even Vira, who is my best friend. My only friend. I don't know why I feel this way, but I know that I have to let her be with other people.

    Vira has always been the popular girl. She was invited to all of the parties, asked out by all the guys and she had a large group of friends. For years, I just stood in her shadow. No, not just her shadow, but the shadow of everyone. I never so much as talked to her. We would walk past each other in the hall ways and it was like we were a part of two seperate dimensions. Her, in her perfect bubble and me, in my wooden boat with four holes to many in the bottom. I was a wreck, a loner. I never had friends before, I didn't know how to have friends. So, I simply told myself that I never needed them.

    One fateful night, only a few months ago, She was being bullied. It was the middle of a dark alley, and she was surrounded by four guys who wanted to rape her. They surrounded her blocking off all exits, and threatened to tell everyone that she was a whore if she said one word to anyone at school. They started closing in on her, grabbed her, started to take off her clothes.

    Whatever I did, I know that it was the right thing to do. I couldn't just sit there and watch such a vile act take place. What I did was the right thing.

    It had to be.